Finally, Chinese New Year had offcially approached its end. Yes, indeed, i couldnt be more than happy for this. Literally, most people would say, the new year had ended in fact, long ago, before the offcial 15days was up. Most visitations, collecting of angbaos, gettin red packets, gamblin, mahjongs, or perhaps incidents like "followin parents for some once-year-see-on-time visitation to-duno-who-family yet-you-had-to-pretend-that-you-know-them-so-well.
All these had came to a pass indeed. I doubt there would be alots of Chinese doin all these now, as for these, it's done only intensively on the first few days of the CNY. However, if you asked me, wat i like most about CNY. I would reply you, in a flat tone completely without an intense doubt. A Firm No. Indeed. Totally Nothin. Tell me, how's your reunion dinner full of sumptuous food, deliciously slurped till the last drop, and i'll tell you my reunion was maggie mee, eaten alone, in front of the television, at 130am after work. And yes. I'm proud of it. Not for the fact of the maggie mee, or havin an alone reunion.
Say, I'd missed reunion dinner with my family. Even with the whole lot of relatives in Malaysia. For it's a tradition that every year, we're to go back to my Grandma's for the 30-over people dinner. I'd missed the gatherings with my only-able-to-see-about-twice-a-year relatives, i'd missed playin ba-luck with the same generation cousins, i'd missed havin mahjong sessions with the grown-ups, i'd missed answerin questions on my current doings, i'd missed clearin doubts of silly-yet-oh-so-common questions, i'd missed gettin some angpaos of cheapo relatives who pretend not to know how many kids my parents has. I'd missed. However, for the above mentioned, for all that I had missed, I miss. Not a single bit.Certainly. It would be evident. I hated CNY. Much. Curious as most maybe. Silly as some would argue.
Somehow, CNY period is just another season. I used to think. CNY is very much about the Angpaos we had collected in the past few years. However, as i grew older, the significant of money came. By calculation, these "blessings/the additional money in the red packets", is as equlivent to wat my parents gave. For every $4 you had received, they would be givin either the same amount, or perhaps more. It's additional "God-blessed"? I certainly doubt so. Tat explains how come, Airlines tremedously increased their fares in these so-called peak period, and people are still willing to pay. Like they says, "More worth it than givin angpaos, whole family still can go holiday somemore." One stone kills two birds, of course.
"But well. CNY is extensively for gatherings. For people whom are abroad. Chinese New Year would be the period whereby everyone gets together, for a dinner. Tat's why they called it reunion." Yes, some could have the nerve to say this. Eh, so wat. i dun see any importance of it. Especially, it certainly doesnt help much, if you have totally irriatin relatives whom, I called them "TONA"s. Talk Only, No Action. And, they never failed to "test the system". On the other hand, neither could i argue back in a more sacratic tone, nor i could simply do nothin.
Irony it may seems. As a child gradually steps into adulthood, the joyous feel of Chinese New Year each year, is greatly diminishin. Ok, am aint 100% sure about other 22years olds. However, to me, it is. Still. I could vividly remember, how celebratory my CNY was, while growin up.
In our pre-primary schools, as well as primary school days, growing up in the small town of Johor. Each year in the afternoon, of CNY Eve, as routine, we would rushed like wild boars, to avoid the jams, to be there with them (the relatives), to be on time, for the sumptuous reunion dinner. Meanwhile, Daddy would drive us to some shophouse, to get buy-watever-you-wan fireworks. Which would be the climax of the CNY. This went one for quite some years, till one fine day. Malaysian Government realized too much of their attap houses are burnt, and placed a ban on the sale of fireworks.
However, it didnt damped our CNY moods either. As kids, we're still excited. However, this time, its another story. The gambling. At that point of ban, the pre-primary school us had grown up, and learnt our Maths, able to do metal yet rapid calculation, for Ban-luck. Or to some of you, Blackjack. But of course, we were excited about our new found talent too. So, as the adults are so-called "mahjongin", we, the kids, kept ourselves busy with Blackjackin.
Apparently, these "kids" grew over the years. As one got older, one got more distant. Some went overseas for further studies, some went other places to earn a living, some had been married. Intially, it was a sad feeling. Failing to each a particular cousin on CNY eve at the reunion dinner. However, as each year passes by, and the table got smaller, and my euthusism about CNY got lesser too.
Till this day, instead of rushin like a wild boar, I looked at my Dad and asked, with the most pathetic voice, "Do we have to go?", "Can I not?". Each year, i got the same stern face, "totally hopeless" glance, and the same answer. NO. So indeed. I went. I sulked. I dread the days. I acted like i'm really interested/excited to see each and everyone of them. I tried hard to remember the excat old tradition way of addressin each relative. I tried to totally engrossed in the silly shows they were showin in Astro. I ignored those oh-so-sickenin faces of the upper generation. I siggnered discreetly about the piao-lang-mama, bringin 7kids with rm2 red packets. I tried to sleep in the dusty livin room, and the tendency of wakin up with a flu the next day.
Of course, you can imagine how elastic i was, in Singapore for Chu 1&2. Indeed, after 22years. No doubt. I may patheticly had to endure work on a CNY Eve. I may had to stand in the midst of Chinatown, shoutin "Happy New Year!". I may not have a crowded reunion dinner. I may had been endovered by the crowd awaitin the fireworks, after work. I may had a maggie-mee-one-dish-course dinner. I may had stayed at home the whole day of Chu 1. I may had settled my dinner, with over-charged coffeeshop fare. I may had no places to do my own visiation as, my friends were all busy with family visitin on Chu 1. I may at times, ate the new year goodies as a meal. I may missed out some redpackets from potential givers.
But Pathetic? Absolutely NOT.
I just. DUN like. Chinese New Years.
